Latest Articles
External Validation: How Childhood Trauma Shapes Our Need for Approval
What Is External Validation? Let’s cut to the chase: External validation is like outsourcing your self-esteem to a committee of…
10 Bad Habits of Low Self Esteem and How they Limit You
The first step in improving your self esteem is being able to recognize the limiting behavior patterns. This can be…
The Fear of Disappointing Others — And Where It Really Comes From
You meet someone. The conversation flows. They seem genuinely interested in you. And something in you immediately starts looking for…
Why Do I Always Justify Myself? The Trauma Response Behind Over-Explaining
There’s a pattern that looks like poor communication but is actually something more specific and more painful. It starts with…
The Fawn Response: How Trauma Makes You a People Pleaser
You walk away from a conversation feeling completely drained. Nothing bad happened. The person was polite. You smiled, you listened,…
Why Some People Can Never Relax at Work (No Matter How Hard They Try)
There’s a specific kind of exhaustion that has nothing to do with how much work you actually did. It’s the…
How Parental Control Can Lead to Learned Helplessness: A Childhood Ruled by Fear
Looking back, I can see the patterns so clearly now. My father’s interference in my life wasn’t just about control,…
The Scapegoat Belief That Stops You From Pursuing What You Want
There’s a specific thought pattern that surfaces whenever a scapegoat considers doing something on their own terms. It doesn’t announce…
Authority Anxiety: Why “We Need to Talk” Can Feel Like a Threat
Four words. That’s all it takes. “We need to talk.” It doesn’t matter who said it, or why, or what…
8 Things Nobody Tells You About EMDR Therapy – What the Hard Weeks Really Feel Like
Nobody warns you about the hard weeks. You go into EMDR therapy knowing it’s supposed to help. You’ve heard it…