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non engagement as defense strategy
Childhood Trauma, Healing, Narcissistic Abuse

Silence vs Non-Engagement: The Crucial Difference When Dealing With Teasing and Bullies

March 11, 2026
32 Views

Most people who grew up in controlling or abusive households learned two responses to teasing,…

Tom Foster
conflict and nervous system
Childhood Trauma, Narcissistic Abuse

Why Victims of Narcissistic Abuse Are Conditioned to Lose Every Conflict

March 9, 2026
32 Views

For years, I thought I had a skill gap. Every time I froze in an…

Tom Foster
fear of what follows success
Childhood Trauma, Healing, Narcissistic Abuse

Why Success Can Feel More Terrifying Than Failure

March 5, 2026
38 Views

Most people assume that fear of failure is the thing that holds people back. But…

Tom Foster
support and the fear of being helped
Childhood Trauma, Healing, Narcissistic Abuse

When Support Comes With a Threat Attached: Why Some People Fear Being Helped

March 3, 2026
27 Views

There’s a scene in The Simpsons where Bart develops an interest in electric guitar. His…

Tom Foster
Why Asking for More Money Can Feel Terrifying
Childhood Trauma, Narcissistic Abuse

Why Asking for More Money Can Feel Terrifying (And Why It’s Not About Money)

March 2, 2026
27 Views

There’s a pattern that shows up in a surprising number of people who grew up…

Tom Foster
Never Relax at Work
Healing, Narcissistic Abuse

Why Some People Can Never Relax at Work (No Matter How Hard They Try)

March 1, 2026
40 Views

There’s a specific kind of exhaustion that has nothing to do with how much work…

Tom Foster
childhood trauma
Childhood Trauma, Narcissistic Abuse

Trained to Lose: How Childhood Survival Creates a Lifetime of Shrinking, Self-Sabotage, and Emotional Management

February 27, 2026
47 Views

Most people assume trauma shows up as fear, panic, or overwhelm. But for many adult…

Tom Foster
afraid to commit to relationship - no backup
Narcissistic Abuse

Why Some People Can’t Fully Commit to a Relationship (And It’s Not Fear of Commitment)

February 27, 2026
37 Views

Most people have heard the advice: “Don’t keep one foot out the door in relationships.…

Tom Foster
suffering the price of safety
Narcissistic Abuse, Uncategorized

When Suffering Becomes the Price of Safety: A Pattern Worth Recognizing

February 27, 2026
39 Views

Have you ever noticed that nothing good in your life ever came easily — not…

Tom Foster
scapegoat betrayal
Uncategorized

When “Tolerance” Is a Trap: How Narcissistic Family Systems Train the Scapegoat to Abandon Themselves

December 11, 2025
62 Views

There is a moment in healing when a single sentence — from a video, a…

Tom Foster

Latest posts

The Bait and Jab: How Manipulative People Use Softness to Set Up the Attack

April 8, 2026
10 Views
hidden trap in conversations

Curiosity vs Interrogation: Why Some Questions Feel Safe and Others Feel Like a Trap

April 6, 2026
7 Views

Recognizing Narcissistic Patterns in Storytelling: Ghosts of Tsushima

April 3, 2026
15 Views
co regulation and nervous system

Why Some People Calm Your Nervous System Instantly

March 26, 2026
16 Views

Categories

  • Childhood Trauma
  • Frame Control
  • Healing
  • Narcissistic Abuse
  • Self Esteem
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About us

Hi Tom here. Hope you enjoy this content. My focus is on healing the effects of childhood trauma caused by narcissistic parents. Here are a few articles that you may find interesting.

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